In the Midst

For the first few years after we moved into our house, I sat in the backyard a lot.  If I was home, I was out there--kicking the soccer ball, chasing the chickens, playing with the dogs, reading a book and just enjoying a huge yard.  Over the years, the traffic behind my house has become non-stop and I stopped hanging out in the backyard for anything more than a quick trip to feed the chickens or call the dogs inside.

Call me redneck, but sitting with the chickens used to bring a peacefulness to my spirit like nothing else.  I felt settled and content and happy and rested.  But it's been several years since I've done that.

Yesterday morning, I went out to feed the chickens and check for eggs.   After I had filled up their food dish and sprinkled their scratch around the coop, I looked up and spied a beautiful sky.  I immediately tried to get a picture that included the chickens and the sky and found myself frustrated.  First of all, there was a metal storage building across the street that I couldn't get out of my view.  And the cars and trucks wouldn't stop passing through.  And the lighting just didn't compare to what I saw with my eyes vs. what I saw through the lens.  I finally just snapped it and sighed from disappointment.

And then I had a thought...

Maybe rest and soul work isn't always meant to be in a peaceful setting.  Maybe it's meant to be in spite of the hustle and bustle around me.  How often do I truly get time to get away and sit in quiet?  Doing that takes a lot of time and planning.

Maybe I need to create a quite space in the midst of the busyness around me.  In the midst of the traffic that won't stop.  In the midst of things in my sight that I wish weren't.  In the midst of things being less than they once were,

Maybe true rest is more about the state of my insides.  Maybe it comes in spite of the circumstances around me.