Tuesday, June 30, 2020
But tonight, she did it! She conquered her fear and drove on the smooth highway that was a straight shot and 5 mins faster to get home. As we were cruising along, I had a thought...
How many times is the path in front of me very easy and yet, I take the long way around? Maybe because I'm scared of the other cars on the road. Maybe because I've gotten used to taking it slow and am afraid of going fast. Maybe just because it's unfamiliar. So I continue to drive the road that curves and winds, dodge the kids on bikes and families with strollers. I'm even even willing to deal with the stop signs every 1/4 mile.
Just so I can avoid the highway.
But when I do and the music is blaring and the windows are down (unless it's summer in Texas--then it's much better for the AC to be crankin), there's a freedom that envelops my whole body. A joy that comes with the speed. A feeling of being untethered.
And it IS worth tackling my fear.
So if you happen to wave at me when we are out and about on the road, I may not see you because I'll be singing "Life is a Highway" at the top of my lungs.
Tuesday, June 23, 2020
Him: It's raining and lightning.
Me: I'm going anyway--lightning won't strike me.
Him: SIGH...I'll go.
Me: I don't mind.
Him: (As he buttons his raincoat) Remember, I want to be cremated, not buried.
Me: Where do you want me to throw your ashes? The farm?
Him: I don't care--you can throw me in the toilet.
Me: I'll scatter you at the farm at dead dog hill over Bubba and Callie and Hank.
Him: Well, that's better than Dead Chicken Hill.
Tuesday, March 24, 2020
But, the reality that this probably won't be over in a few more days hit me and sent me in a downward spiral of worry and unrest.
When I start to feel sorry for myself, I know I need to find ways to look outside of myself--not to escape, but to remind me that my fears are small in the big picture of life. So, with that in mind, this morning I decided to sign up to help pass out food to families at our church's ministry center.
Y'ALL! We fed 280 kids tonight! Most of what I did was sorting and packing--which, if you know me, you know how much of that I've done the last 9 years with Lovepacs! It brought me life! I can't buy food for all those kids, but I can help put together a box that has a variety of food in it and pray over it as I pack it! I can invite a friend to help pack with me. I can tell others of the needs for food.
And, tonight, I am going to bed with a smile on my face and joy in my heart. I made a difference today by doing something small, but something I am good at.
If you are looking for a way to make a difference, they are passing out food to families from 5-6pm each night until Friday. You can donate food at the Argyle campus (there are bins outside the main entrance of Cross Timbers Church) or, if you live in Aubrey, you can leave food on my porch and I will get it there. We needed LOTS more canned veggies and fruit, kid-friendly soups, canned tuna/chicken, and chef boyardee-type meals tonight. There were plenty of snack items, but things like spaghetti would have been a great addition to the boxes we handed out to families.
You can also sign up to pass out the food. Here is the link: https://crosstimberschurch.org/hopecenter/?fbclid=IwAR0omi4aOmcITV7nMow-MASa8Bta_M-O7xZJDIN0YN532hT0cJvOS2XlKCs
If you know of a family in need, send them to Cross Timbers Church in Denton btwn 5-6pm. They will need to bring their kids with them. They will stay in the car and volunteers will bring the boxes to them.
Finally, would you pray with me--for enough food for every family who comes this week? For enough volunteers to sort and pack? For this ministry center staff who is planning and organizing all the moving parts of this behind the scenes?
Praying for all of us tonight--that we each find a way to get out of ourselves and serve others in a way that not only brings hope to them, but brings us life too!
Saturday, February 22, 2020
As I was contemplating this and suppressing the need to defend my weight, I had another thought. This medical staff has never seen me before today. They don't know who I was--they only see who I am at this moment. They don't know that yesterday I had a milestone. (I officially hit the 50 lb weight loss mark--yay me!) But they don't know that (unless I tell them). They look at today's numbers and make their assessment based on it.
How often do we let what we failed at yesterday define us today? Most days, I still see that 50 lbs when I look in the mirror. Or the yelling I did at my girls. Or the task that once again did not get marked off my list. Or the lack of compassion I showed to a co-worker. I could go on and on here--I'm an expert at failing.
How different would today be if I took it at face value? If I looked at the facts and not the history. What would change?
Monday, January 6, 2020
I'll admit, that made me a bit regretful. I love this place so much that it's hard to not think I waited too long to get here. In my head, I know I didn't--the peopleI met at my previous church were more than worth it. But, as people were reminiscing about the first years, I found myself a bit melancholy and envious. Partly because I don't talk to many from my old church any more. Friendships that I thought would last forever have died away. Also, I like history--and being a part of it. I'm used to being the one with the memories and I don't like the new girl feeling--that yuck of being on the outside, looking in.
As I was wallowing, I kept seeing people post pics next to a big 20 display our team had made.
And I realized that display was created around the snow globe structure that Brian had made me for our kids lobby this Christmas.
So maybe I DO get to have a part in the memories, but I also have a part moving forward. I get to be a part of the new memories people make.
Friday, January 3, 2020
I realized my love of books in 3rd grade. The school library was closed and I was in tears. Mrs. Moore, my teacher, let me borrow a few of her personal books. The summer after, my parents "paid" me in books to watch my sister while they were at work AND I gave me a subscription to Weekly Reader. Did anyone else subscribe to this? When those 2 books came every month, I would read them over and over!!! There was no Amazon prime back in the day
A few years ago, Brian and I were having a conversation (okay--it was an argument, but does that really matter?). In the course of it, I was defending my love of reading as not just being a "lazy sport" like I thought my family believed it to be. As a kid, we didn't have much money or take many vacations. Books were my trips. I was (and still am) an awkward kid who meant well, but didn't make friends easily. Books provided characters who didn't make fun of me when I cried for them or got angry on their behalf.
So, what's on YOUR must-read/want-to-read/need-to-read/required-to-read list this year? How do you keep track of what you've read? Where do you get your book recommendations?
And most importantly, what have you read that I need to read this year?
Wednesday, January 1, 2020
So, like in 2018, when THE word popped in my head, I tried to push it out. (In 2018, it was "Consistent" and that felt soooo boring. It ended up being the word that inspired me the most out of all my words and that I saw God move through all year long.) I kept going back to the other words I had put in my notes section of my phone. I did another online quiz to tell me what it should be. I pretended that I was still praying and thinking about it. I tried to rationalize why it was not a good one...
- It was too inward-focused and I want to be outward focused this year.
- It has been over-used. It was "cutting-edge" several years ago, but now it's just old hat and not original.
- It wasn't God-focused.
For 2020, my word will be TRIBE.
For me, tribe is a word to describe my peeps--the people I love and who love me. I have a tendency to spread myself thin and not be "all-in" with the people who matter most because I'm trying to do and be more for people who honestly, just don't matter as much to me. I ask my girls to shhhh so I can hear a tv show (that could easily be paused). I fail to grab lunch with friends I love because it takes effort and I want to be lazy or the opposite--tell myself I should be working instead of hanging out.
Tribe is people--the ones who matter. The ones who don't sugarcoat the truth for me and who don't care if I wear make-up or have an annoying laugh. The ones I KNOW have my back when push comes to shove. The ones who challenge and encourage me and send a text at just the right time. The ones I can do the same for without feeling awkward.
And to be completely authentic here, I don't think my tribe is complete. I believe it needs to widen a bit and that makes me a little tired. Tribes take time and energy and I'm getting old, y'all!
Brian asked me what having a word of the year does for me. It keeps me on track. It reminds me to open my eyes to what God is doing in and through and around me. It focuses me on what matters most.
Here's my ask of YOU. If you see the word tribe in a meme or on a written in a quote or expressed on a sign, would you send it to me? You can message me, email me or better yet--text it to me (random happy texts make my day!). This will help me keep it in the forefront of my mind and serve as a reminder to re-evaluate how I'm doing with my tribe.