Years ago--14 to be exact--I applied for a job at a church.
Let me explain something...I NEVER planned to work at a church. I was not angry toward God or anything, I wasn't against the church, I just didn't see myself in a role like that.
I had volunteered at this particular church for 7 years before applying for a job. I had been through a few Kids Pastors and several staff and frankly, was a little frustrated by the direction things were going, so we decided to look for a new church. Instead, as I started having conversations, I ended up on staff--isn't that the best answer--dive into the deep end?
The role I applied and was hired for was an administrative one, working with the Volunteer Director. In fact, a huge part of why I wanted the job was because of the lady who would be my boss--Bobbi Miller. Maybe I should be embarrassed to admit this, but when I met with Bobbi the first time, I was actually more drawn to her than to the role itself. Not only did she have this amazing vision for what Kids ministry could be, she was a mom who had kids a few years older than me. My girls were 2 and 4 at the time and I was desperate to find someone who could be a mentor to me since I didn't have a mom.
I was hired and even though there were others more qualified, I was given a chance.
One week later, Bobbi moved into the Kids Pastor role so her previous role--my immediate boss--was now open. Honestly, that kinda rocked my world. I signed on to work with Bobbi and even though I would still report up to her, it wouldn't necessarily be side by side.
The next big thing is that we completely changed the way we did ministry. We switched to a "function" model rather than an age-based one. What this meant on the practical level to me was that I was "losing" leaders to other parts of the ministry. And even though I understood it and believed it was the right thing to do, I was a little worried about how we were going to find people to serve when we already didn't have enough.
And, if that wasn't enough, we decided to give all of our people who had been serving the entire summer off. I remember sitting at a forum with other large churches in the area and being told what a mistake that was and that we would regret it when none of them returned.
This was all within the first month. Flash forward a few months to summer...
It was my favorite! My job was to communicate back and forth with people who had said they would serve one Sunday that summer (over 600 of them!!!) and place them in a role. Most of this was done via email, but it's amazing what you learn about people if you go beyond just a "form" reply. On Sundays, after they checked in to serve, I found myself giddy. It was SO fun to put faces with names and be able to comment on little details they had told me.
And I realized--I think for the very 1st time--how much I loved people. I loved hearing their story, being included in their lives, but most of all, I loved getting to serve them. I rolled/folded their serving t-shirts and prayed over them. I helped to set up a cafe and picked fun snacks that I hoped would make them smile. I learned their kids' and spouses and pets names.
And through this whole time, we were still interviewing people to be my boss. As I voiced my fears to Bobbi, I remember her asking me more than once if I wanted the job.
My answer was an emphatic "NO!" I was not qualified. There were parts of the role that were unfamiliar to me. I'm a behind the scenes person. I'm not a leader. And the list of reasons why just snowballed.
Finally, mid-summer, after an amazing experience with a kid at a camp our church was hosting, I plopped in Bobbi's office and asked, "What if I AM interested?" We talked and prayed and I cried (bet that part's a surprise) and then walked next door into our executive pastor's office. She told him what was going on (I was still a mess). I will forever remember his question to me: "This role is hands on with people--and they are messy. How does that make you feel?"
I wish I could remember my exact response, but it was something along the lines of, "I know. Messy gets complicated. But, is there anything better than getting to be on the front row watching God work in them--and if there were even a slight chance that I would get to be involved in some way in that process, how could I resist that? People are SO WORTH the mess!"
And despite the fact that once again I was not qualified for the role, I was hired in place of others who were. And I can honestly say, I have no regrets about ever stepping into that role--or any of the others it morphed into over the next 10 years.
I can tell you story after story of individuals I got to know and love and serve during that time...
Shannon and Barb who said YES to coaching when we didn't really know what that role meant and didn't even have teams to coach yet...
Chris who filled out an app to serve the day he turned 12 (the youngest age we allowed students to serve) and continued to serve until he left for college...
Beth who led a team to pray for a non-believer who served alongside them in one of our baby rooms...
Patty who followed me around one Sunday (in heels) to figure out where she wanted to serve and ended up on staff alongside me...
Jennifer who created a team that served breakfast to our leaders every week...
Barry who went beyond being a small group leader to being a resource for the parents--most of whom were single and doing it on their own--of the boys in his group...
Katherine & Savannah who spent Valentines night creating treats for their humongous small group of kids...
Paul & Mike & Trevor & Jared who made our Sandbox room a place where my own kids loved going (not to mention how their air guitar skills progressed)...
Tasha & Aaron who caught the vision of a room for leaders' kids and brought in bingo and prizes...
Christie and Becca who created the very 1st large group experience for our preschoolers...
I could go on and on here for at least another few pages, but this post has been long enough.
Sometimes God shows us very clearly what our gifts are. And sometimes, He surprises us and allows us to step into a place that feels uncomfortable at first so that we can fully trust in Him and allow HIM to do the work instead of doing it ourselves.
This is what happened to me. I was allowed to serve beside some of the greatest and can't help but laugh when I think about not stepping into the role because I thought I was too administrative...
Is there something God is whispering to you? Some place He is asking you to push the boundaries? A boat He's asking you to step out of? Or into? If so, it won't always be easy. And you may cry a few tears. And hit your head against the wall once in a while.
But it will be worth it.
I promise.
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