Its strange the things that bring back memories.
I took the girls to Sonic tonight for a treat after a loooonnnng week. I ordered a strawberry shake.
When I was in middle school, we lived out in a spot that was far from any fast food places. Even back then, my dad was the best at finding the best desserts. There was a Sonic that had strawberry shakes that were amazing, but it was 20 minutes away from our house. The strawberries in them were huge and always clogged our straws. We didn't go often, but when we did it was a treat.
I couldn't tell you the last time I had a strawberry shake before tonight--I guarantee I've had several since middle school. But for some reason, the last one I remember having was with him. And I still remember his smile as we got spoons to eat all the strawberries in the bottom after we finished drinking the shake.
It's the little things that stop me in my tracks. Maybe because I prepare myself for the big ones (his birthday falls on Thanksgiving this year so I'm already gearing myself up for THAT one).
A few weeks ago, I had to cross his name off the girls school forms as an emergency contact and let's just say I don't want to have to do that again. There's no words to describe the finality of marking through a name of someone you love and knowing you will never again put him on an emergency contact list.
A friend posted on FB tonight that they had to call in hospice for her loved one and it took me back to the amazing hospice people we had for Dad. (It also made me giggle because I remembered my dad trying to keep the fact that hospice was called in from us when my sisters were already at the house meeting the people delivering the bed.) It also brought up a fresh wave of grief.
Just like most everything else in life, it's the little things that affect us the most. It's the stuff we don't think will matter--the small steps in one direction that end up taking us down a new path or the seemingly inconsequential choices that move us to something we never expected.
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