500 Words

Happy New Year!  It's 2014 and once again, I'm trying to decide if I want to get serious about my writing/blogging.  Some days, I think I do.  Others, I don't know what I even have to say that hasn't been said way more eloquently by someone else. 

So I'm trying an experiment.  I joined a group of people who have committed to writing 500 words a day for the month of January.  It should be easy, right?  I can certainly speak 500 words in a very short amount of time.  I'm not supposed to go back and edit and I'm supposed to do it every day. 

I don't do good with these types of things.  While I can be a rule follower, things like bring out the rebellious teenager in me.  I may write daily, but I may only do 300 words one day and 800 the next.  And I wonder where my daughters get their issues with authority??? 

I'm only at 159.  Actually, this paragraph puts me over 160 now.  I don't even know how to count the words on my blog page, so do you know what I'm doing?  I'm typing here and then cutting and pasting it into a Word document so I can see how many I have.  Could there be a more technological-disadvantaged person than me? 

I have other things to write, but they don't really go with this blog post.  So maybe I will close this one and start a new one.  It still counts if they are 2 posts--as long as they equal up to 500 words, right? 

Now I'm over halfway there.  This is usually the length I like to keep my blog posts.  Yes, I know I tend to ramble more most of the time, but my goal is always to do a short post so people don't get bored reading it. 

In the past, I've said I want to be a writer, but I'm not sure I want to do that anymore--which makes me sad.  I'm searching my motives to make sure it's not fear or just laziness keeping me from putting down more words.  And I don't think it is.  Part of me thinks it's insecurity (which really is fear) and the other part of me just thinks I've become smart enough to know I will never write like Bob Goff or Donald Miller or any of the other people I love to read. 

And what do I really want to say?  Is this just to leave memories for my girls or is it because I want people to look at me and comment on what talent I have?  Do I have a message that I want to get out there or do I just want to talk to hear (or read) myself talk? 

Lots to ponder as I embark on this new task or adventure--I'm not sure yet which one this will turn out to be. 

So, wish me luck as I embrace this.  And with that, I've hit my 500 words today.  Maybe this won't be as hard as I thought...