Ever have those moments when you think, "Oh my goodness! Can life get any better than this?!?!" And you want to post about them on Facebook or tweet them on Twitter or throw up a pic on Instagram, but you stop yourself because you don't want to be "THAT" bragging person.
I am authentic to a fault, but I can't always post the stuff that happens in my house. I like my family too much (most days) and really don't want to intentionally cause any more reasons for my kids to sit in a counselors office than I already do unintentionally.
Celebrating is good.
And it's needed.
But I'm not very good at it...
I'm not the half full or half empty glass person. I'm the person that is trying to figure out if there's enough water in the glass for whoever is drinking it. So I often get caught up in how to make things better and forget to just bask in a moment.
Life is crazy right now. Even though we no longer have the insane soccer schedule, we still find enough to fill our days full. And I'm guilty of coming home and enjoying sitting behind a closed bedroom door with little to no margin for my family.
Yesterday, I locked my keys in my car. Again. Except this time it was in Frisco and unlike Aubrey, I don't think their fire dept would take mercy on me (yes, I DO know from personal experience that the Aubrey fire dept will come unlock your car for you if you leave the keys inside--just one more reason I love small town life--but that's a story for another day).
ANYWAY...I had to call my hubby to come unlock my car and umm... bring me lunch. Which he did. Without complaining or making me feel like a fool or even acting like it was a pain for him to drive 35 minutes each way in the middle of his work day. And if that wasn't enough, he sat in the nail salon to get a gift card for Caroline's bday--without me even asking him to do it! (Now, I did get several texts while he was there about how stinky the place was, etc...)
And this morning, I walked in to see Hope curling Caroline's hair for her. On a school morning. When she is NOT a morning person and rolls out of bed just in time to drink her coffee and get out the door. She even re-did several strips that didn't pass her standards.
Most days, I get irritated with Brian because we aren't as romantic as I think we should be. Our dates consist of hole-in-the-wall burger joints, him fishing and me reading--with little to no words spoken between us, trips to the lumber store, breakfast in downtown Aubrey, and violent movies that have way too much blood. I don't get random flowers for just being a good wife and I can't remember the last time we dressed up and went to dinner (unless you count funerals and the food brought for the family afterward).
And most days, I wonder where we went wrong in parenting. Our girls fight. A lot. And most mornings, there is at least one door slammed. And if you listened in, you would think yelling is our superpower. And, as much as I WANT kindness to be our go-to, usually it's replaced with mean, sarcastic words and tones.
So, when I say that today, I feel blessed, please know I realize it won't last. Tomorrow won't be Caroline's bday and there will be screams over who unplugged whose straightener. And Brian will leave early for a work trip and might forget to kiss me goodbye until I make a snarky comment. And I will get angry because someone's pineapple juice from the day before leaked all over their lunchbox and I have to clean it up.
But today, I'm holding on tightly with all my strength to the overwhelming love I feel right now toward my 3 people. And after I've yelled and apologized tomorrow morning, I will bask in it again.